The Peachfuzz Chronicles

June 27, 2011

Twinkie Hinky

Filed under: Twinkie's Posts — by thepluckygastronome @ 7:25 pm
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Twinkie here. I just want to go on the record by saying (in the words of my favorite dog-collar-wearing forensic scientist Abby Sciuto) that something “hinky” is going on here.

Here I am. At my "spot" watching over Mommy.

First, Daddy takes Mommy out. They are gone the whole day. Then, Daddy takes Tripper out. They are gone half the day. Then Girly takes Mommy out. They are gone all day. Then Girly takes Tripper out. Me? I go nowhere. But here’s the part that will make you sit up and beg… When they get home they SMELL different! It’s like this over and over again. I can’t keep up!

Recently, Mom was outside looking at Tripper and asked Daddy if he thought he had a “Klingon” (which is code for something stinky that hasn’t quite hit the ground.) When Daddy gave him a pat-down, everybody went bazonkers!! Tripper had lost half the fur on his butt. But I could have told you that for a while now, if anybody would have just listened!! My “Roo-ing” is falling on deaf ears these days!!

Boy! Did Mommy and Daddy feel bad. “How could we NOT notice?” they wailed. Gee… do you think they’ve been spending too much time taking Mommy out to notice?…

But I digress. So it appears that Tripper has skin lesions and is taking antibiotics. He’s lost hair. He’s made several trips to the vet. He comes back smelling like VET. Mommy is upset but calm. There’s so much sniffing going on that my snoot is having a hard time keeping up.

But wait… there’s more:  Mommy gets a phone call. Grandma is in the hospital. She has a bunch of problems. The biggest surprise was the E. Coli she has been fighting since January. Mommy is more upset but she won’t say much, telling Daddy, “Now I’m on antibiotics, my MOM is on antibiotics, my DOG is on antibiotics…”

Then, Mommy gets another call last Sunday. Her uncle had a massive stroke and is not expected to live. Things are very quiet. Mommy has more hot flashes and night sweats. She tells me there’s nothing she can do but wait and see what comes next.

When Mommy comes back from wherever it is that she goes all day, she smells REALLY weird. It’s a new metallic kind of stinky. She is tired all weekend and I sometimes get to nap with her because it’s my job.

My role as Mommy-Protector is even more critical, and my mission is not without its challenges. I’m often relieved of bed-duty early. This is not my fault, it’s a personnel issue. When Girly goes to work, she puts me down, as my legs are too short for me to jump off the bed on my own. The bed is too tall. Mommy can’t lift me up and down anymore like she could before. I still stand guard from the ground, although I can’t observe and report my best at floor level.

Oh, and did I mention that Daddy said something about the microwave going on the the fritz? I’m telling you. It’s hinky around here.

Roo!

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